smells and comforts

I bought a t-shirt from my favorite coffee shop and I wore it all afternoon. It smelled like coffee, vanilla and just warm delectable goodness. I also got a pedicure today and the place is right next to this beloved coffee place so when the dude giving me the pedicure said how I found out about the place I said well you are next to one of my favorite places. He suggested they pay me for advertisitng by the fact that I wear their merch but no just the shirt is payment enough.

I was reading an old thankful journal while I let the bubbles and jets massage my feet at he Bamboo spa – I noticed it was old from years back but several times I thanked God for pretty toes or finger nails and I knew it was just a part of me – having a little color on me.

I’ve been having trouble motivating to paint my own toes so love to the husband who sent me on my way to get pretty.

I stopped exercise all summer but I recently have started walking some. I like it.

I am tired and ready for my quilt to wrap around me.

As far as comforts go I also found once again a song duo I loved a long time ago and they still make beautiful melodies. So coffee scented shirts and music, pretty toes I think I am good.

the come back

I haven’t written in a long time but I decided to come back to the blank page. Life is definitely not a blank page! I feel like having kids keeps the ball rolling for ya pretty much all the time. Until lights out at night and you can kinda let go and just be you. But don’t check your phone or email because coaches and teachers and people who care or need to plan are gonna be there.

My husband started a new job a year ago and I watched him get up every day and push through the weeds of it all. I saw him get discouraged and then go out and look for men to help him learn what no one was teaching him. I type this because I’m impressed and proud. But I saw or I think I saw this or maybe God saw this early on for me – I’m blessed to be his wife. Always have been.

We also stopped homeschooling 3 years ago or well this is the 3rd year they are in Christian based school and that means l’ve been trying to navigate a new path for myself. The first year I took a lot of suggestions and tried what had worked for the suggester. That was a flop. The second year I read all of the opportunities myself and tried a few and it was ok but I think I thought it was going to be my thing and it wasn’t. I flopped again. So now we have this year and I think I have found myself just hoping to have one or two comrades to sit with at functions and let it be. Also by now I am happy to say that I’ve talked to my kids friends moms and met them so that’s better… progress. NO need to prove I can do it all.

I wish life was simple – a sign pointing this is the way you should go! But it is not and patience is a must. and laughter and tears and single serve microwave cookies are needed. God does have the path in His hands and he’ll hand it out little by little is usually your best bet.

I have to go now and eat lunch and get dressed so I don’t embarrass my kids later.

It seems that we have been handing our share of disappointments lately. It has been hard on me. I think there is an inevitability in life that of course we will be disappointed! But I live in a place that can get my head in a deceptive place of everything should be just so – this is not at all how God wants me to think.

If I really look around and am brave enough I will see how everyone is hurting in some way. Carrying burdens of different shapes and sizes.

The crucible and blessing of the Christian life is that we learn to wait patiently. Share well. Receive well. Endure hardships that come- for me everyday – but I am a light weight so… that these sufferings and over and over again being put back to square one are grace at work in our lives – my life to be perfectly open with you. And that these things along with me allowing them to change me will hopefully make me stronger.

Don’t be dejected and sad for the joy of the Lord is your strength.

Nehemiah 8:10

So, today is Saturday and I had these juicy frozen but I unthawed them cherries in my smoothie today. YUM.Then I sat in my bedroom and read my Bible and felt the Love of God spurring me on and also being right where I am with me.

I had a huge enormous headache yesterday and slept a lot and then slept all night – however…. today I decided to get up and exercise with my video lady and then see how I felt after sweating. Ok, I guess I feel better than yesterday.

I have 3 fiction books loaded on my kindle but I also would like a flower or 2 planted in the front yard…

I had to ask the boys not to run in and out of the house 9 times in the span of about 10 minutes yesterday. They said OK and seemed to settle that down a little.

We watched Aladdin 2 last night. I just caught the end of it. The other day we watched Mulan 2 and I am highly impressed with how they showed love has to take work. Good job Disney.

Ok, I need to lay on the couch now.

I haven’t decided how I feel emotionally this morning – wait can I mean I haavn’t decided what my mood is going to be! That’s what I’m saying… I got out of bed and drank a smoothie.

Did I tell you that it isn’t that hard to add some fruits and vegetables to your day without spending a fortune on something fancy. For instance: I used frozen blueberries and a banana. I measured the blueberries so I felt confident they were a cup of them. Then the late night snack last nigth was an apple. And a small piece of the HOME MADE bread I freaking made myself with my HANDS. It’s a work in progress to learn bread making… and my husband found yeast! Everywhere was out of it for awhile.

I ordered Bobs Red Mill products from Vitacost.com and I was pleased with the price and everything. The graham crackers take ground up flax and or wheat germ and I like Bob’s version.

I had to take a nap yesterday because I noticed I was getting a gut. I don’t think I have been as active lately. I had to take the nap because I worked the old bod pretty good during my home exercise session. So I was tired.

I may need some coffee now actually… or water, water is the key

Sometimes stretching or talking to a friend can be a great addition to the wake up routine. I think it’s important to talk to friends really often and tell each other how you feel. And then share recipes and parenting ideas and what have you. I think that’s helpful to our metal well being as women – super important.

I have tried for years to get my man to think like a girl and thankfully that never took – but regretfully too because the dude is right here in the house with me. But that’s totally by design and that’s why we have FRIENDS!

Let’s see… I’ve been challenging my feelings with what God has to say. Or better put I have been forcing myself to acknowledge that God is always able to hold me up and help shape me to fit into His will for me. We never stop needing to grow. It is painful. But pain in life is inevitable and so why not let it count for something and grow. I mean imagine you wanted your pixie cut to grow into a bob. You have to take some steps to get it there. But if you just keep cutting the hair and being sad about not getting the bob do well then you are stuck – but let it grow – use the good shampoo (clean out the human heart) and conditioner (receive the small gifts of grace). Be patient and remember hair is faithful to grow – just like God is faithful to shape our person – if we don’t cut Him off in the process.

A friend was talking about eating her fruits and vegtables again. That can be easy to forget. So, I thought she made it sound do -able and I am doing it with the occasional hot cheesy pizza in the mix. And an occasional Hostess mini cake.

As of the moment I am uber starving so I am eating a giant salad with beans and other fillings. It is very good.

Last night I had quinoa and vegetable egg rolls all from trader joes frozen section. Then I topped it off with that hostess cup cake I mentioned earlier.

I did my exercises in the room we all do our stuff in upstairs. The son that had to move his garb out of the way was grumpy.

Sorry Charlie. Do you want me to move and shake and make the earth quake? Cause that’s important for almost middle aged people who don’t jump on trampolines all day. Stuff might get stuck if I don’t move ‘er around.

Plus I tend to get a negative outlook if I don’t DO SOME movement with the ‘ol body.

I think I have a bubble bottom, so I think of the song all about that base no treble while I exercise. Then I remember its about the movement of the body and not looking like a thin Asian lady. They are so pretty. But that is not me. Anyway I also remember its about the WHOLE person not just the outside. Aren’t I just a lovely little peach of a blog friend telling you bizarre insider info.

Ha HA Ha

No but really. The sons were listening to a professional author talk about the hero in a book. The hero can’t give up even though they have many bad days, obstacles and lack of confidence sometimes. And they don’t get to the “prize” or what you have it alone. They have mentors and cheerleaders and places they go for respite.

So since in truth we are all hero’s then it’s been good for me to ask myself if I have these things…. and if I don’t then work towards finding them.

Quote from good ‘ol Max Lucado and then I think this is all for today:

“God would rather us have an occasional limp than a perpetual strut.”

Amen Max, amen (I’m picturing the limp gimpy dog on Robin Hood the original cartoon) Ha Ha Ha Ha I crack myself up. I’m a comin’ I’m a comin’

Today is sort of our beginning of summer. It’s a strange last 4 months and now it’s summer and I mean I think I’m happy about. That’s silly isn’t. I should be over the moon.

See if you didn’t hear me say it before I homeschool. And So I should be happy that the pressure is off… but I just started getting into it! I was ill off and on since October (sorry for the downer of thinking about that!) but I was and so I had to drag through a lot of school days. And I feel better now!

We think (the many opinions I have listened too) that I have severe nasal allergies and that brought on other poo. I THINK I have its under control…

moving on…yes, yes, it’s summer.

The kids are vegetables in front of cartoons. I sleep in. We watch movies in the eve after dinner…

I signed them up for a once a week webinar where children’s author and illustrators talk to them and teach them about their process and then we get all kind of book ideas! Bliss! It happens once a week these webinars. They are upbeat and I think we will continue them through the summer….?

My husband is picking up the grocery order that I made last night and do you ever go a bit over board when your making those???

I thought I was and I ALMOST started to fret – BUT I STOPPED MYSELF mid slide down because we truly were out of the things that I ordered. Like for instances… Shampoo! Conditioner! Soap for the laundry room! My face cream is nearly gone. And we must have moisturizer. It was beginning to make me sweat how low the container was getting… however I also learned how little I really needed to use to cover my face… and then the lavender oil I sometimes put on because isn’t that good for everything? It helped me breathe?

I noticed I put classic hummus on the list and then this am I also noticed that we still had plenty of that left SOOO I put a bunch of that on top of my toast to make sure it got eaten.

It was stuck at the back of our lovely used but lightly used french door refrigerator that we drove clear into the deep woods of the country with our friend who has a pick up truck to buy and load ourselves (since my beloved drives an SUV and looks amazing I might say as he pulls into our drive.) He (my beloved then took said friend out for a steak because apparently that is wonderful to men – who life refrigerators.) I was at home eaten one of those bag salads that has everything in it and they taste delish. I was eating that that day. The children must have been with a friend because I have no recollection of them running around…

My sweater from an evening I was watching QVC has arrived! I am thrilled. But I haven’t opened the sucker yet. I will soon. And that same night I hollered to my husband quick! come see this mosquito collector thing! And he watched and watched and then googled the reviews and he ordered one!!!! HE DID! I truly want it to be an answer to prayer for him. He has the most terrible time with mosquitoes eating him.

and that ‘s all I know… for now wink wink

in the words of maria vontrapp ~ “What shall this day be like…. I wonder ~

I was making some tea last night, before we watched a movie. The tea bag said, It is most important to communicate love. I thought that was lovely to read as I prepared my tea post haste to make it into the living room for our movie.

And how true it is~ if we want to keep people in our lives we must communicate in love. Sometimes things can’t be presently but how we communicate them can. ~ most of the time

I can’t think of another thing to say…..!

I was reading a verse in Habakkuk this morning. It was the verse I had colored and made to stand out on the side of the page. Then I just got into the verses and kept reading…

during this time my son was eating his breakfast. I know this kid. So I say sure you are welcome to have that oatmeal that I made last night. (I made a big batch of oatmeal just cooked it in water and then separated it into bowls for easy eating). I said yes you may have it but make sure you eat it ALL if you fix it.

He does all of this fancy stuff to it — making it “just right” I watch him eat it and I suggest he “drink” it from the bowl – you know tip the bowl up and pour her in because its basically grape jelly cereal now with oatmeal floating around somewhere…

Seconds later he is DONE! He announces. Yeah, right. Yeah right!

I leave the room to sit down in my cozy pull over long sweater and my leggings and he runs past me. I am livid mad. Because I just have this feeeling it all went down my precious sink. I hear him mutter- how come she never believes me…. WELL because our versions of done are different son.

Oh to have eyes inside the bowl so I could know.

Something inside me says I might be over reacting. I try to listen, But I still don’t know… I laugh because the next verse I read said, “I have sent these Babylonians to correct you…” hahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!

I am not yet exactly sure what the exact thing God is using him to correct in me but I do know it keeps me on my knees. Because we can not tell people what they want to hear. We have to be honest with ourselves and our mamas so we will be honest with real people later on. We can’t hide candy wrappers when we are big. It’s just a bad bad thing. (but then again he is only a little guy)

Quote of anonymous person: Where the will of God leads you, the grace of God will keep you. THANK GOODNESS!!! : )

Every single time I long onto this site it tells me they are going to eat my cookies and is that all right with me? Yes, go ahead? I just made peanut butter ones earlier today?

I was all up in a tizzy. I had it in my head that I was pregnant tonight.

So I told my husband all about the book I was reading about the girl who was unmarried and didn’t know right from wrong and was making a choice about her pregnancy and then the lady who was trying to help her process the option of adoption and support she could get got attackted and threated and well that freaked me out royally. I was hoping for a warm help me get to sleep story and that was NOT it at all. AT ALL.

So then see my tummy has been upset and I have had a allergy or head cold forever and I do not have that corona thing I am sure but I did think maybe I remembered feeling this way when I was pregneant. See, it doesn’t help that its midnight. And i havent eaten in hours.

I am remedying that now with crackers and Trader Joes chicken salad.

My husband dug in the cabinet and said here is a pregnancy test. So I took it and NO I AM NOT pregnant nor are we trying to be. He said you better not be and I said well you would have been a part of the making. He then explained the reasons I better not be like… medical prodecures have been done.

There ya go.

So then what do you do when you read something DISTRURBING and your hungry and your not pregnant but you thgouht/think you are but your not and its midnight and I DON”T HAVE A BOOK TO READ.

We did get Disney Plus. Which I am usually agiainst monthly things of the sort because we have cable but this is really worth the money. Great. Great.

I do feel a little nuts so maybe I should call it a day and just get a drink of water.

Oh life, you are too funny.

I didn’t spell check this and thats funny to me….